CORPORATE AVENGERS #1
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
“I.P.O.”
Press Release – Time and again, superheroes save they day. Now, several civic-minded businesses have come together to bring you superheroes that you can truly invest in! Meet the all-new, all-marvelous Super Team®!
Real talk – Superheroes dominate the 24/7 news cycle, and big corporations want free advertising, so they've pulled together a bunch of hard-luck Z-listers willing to sell out and fight crime dressed up like company mascots. What could go wrong?
Step aside Iron Man, this tech hero's suit of armor is powered by the same state-of-the art operating system as your cellular phone! Meet the Google Android!
Jake Miller is one of the lesser-known “Titanium Man”s. He never made much of himself, but he's got experience using a giant green mech-suit and a willingness to work.
Move over Wolverine, this clawed hero has the hearty constitution that only starting each day with a bowl of Kellogg's Frosted Flakes can provide! He's Grrrrrreat! Meet Tony the Tiger!
“Man-Eater” Malcolm Murphy is the result on an experiment that merged a human and a tiger, and he's willing to throw on a red handkerchief for a payday.
Watch out Black Widow, this spy hero for the modern world will protect you like an insurance company that was born online, raised by technology, and that majors in efficiency! Meet Erin Esurance!
Lynn Michaels was a cop turned vigilante that called herself “Lady Punisher,” but punishing didn't pay the bills like dying her hair pink for a corporate sponsorship.
Take a powder, Captain America, this veteran hero is bad-guy lickin' good and powered by the super-soldier herbs and spices found in delicious Kentucky Fried Chicken! Meet Colonel Sanders!
Al "Mac" MacKenzie is a retired S.H.I.E.L.D. agent fallen on hard times, and donning a white suit and glasses is a necessary supplement to his pension.
Buzz off falcon, this flying #hero defeats villains in 140 characters or less! Meet the #TwitterBird!
Red Raven is a young winged woman from Sky-Island who was talked into dying her wings blue for American citizenship.
Climb a tree Rocket Raccoon, this animal hero fights crime with the sustained energy of the world's longest lasting battery! He keeps going, and going, and going... Meet the Energizer Bunny!
Blackjack O'Hare is a space pirate from Half-World stranded on Earth and willing to dye his fur pink if it means fleecing the local yokels into making him a superstar.
And finally, roll over Lockjaw, this pet hero keeps it cool as Budweiser's original party animal! Meet Spuds MacKenzie!
Thori was a talking, fire-breathing hell-hound raised by Loki, now he's been adopted by the executive board of Anheuser-Busch and trussed up to resemble an alcoholic bull terrier. Carried into action by their pilotless quinjet, the Amazon Prime Air Drone, the Super Team® is on the scene and already taking down ne'er–do–wells threatening our job creators! Look for an official press release concerning their victory soon!
If they want to keep their jobs, this team of misfits must stop a mysterious super-powered killer systematically eliminating the one percenters. Easier said then done, as they might just kill each other first! Is this the worst idea ever, or what?
32 PGs./Rated T+...$2.99
CORPORATE AVENGERS #2 ***Limited Series***
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
“TAX HAVEN OR HELL”
Press Release - A sadistic group of killers is targeting the world's most stalwart job-creators! These fiends have vowed that, because corporations are people too, they can be murdered! And now they've struck the one place previously thought safe - Panama! But fear not, brave consumers! The Amazon Prime Drone has already spirited the Super Team® to the region! Colonel Sanders, the Google Android, Erin Esurance, Tony the Tiger, #Twitter, the Energizer Bunny, and Spuds Mackenzie have identified the culprits and are in the process of bringing them to justice and avenging the corporations that have already fallen! Follow us @SuperteamAOM for more exciting developments as they unfold!
Real Talk - Not even tax havens are safe for the boards of big corporations anymore. They're getting picked off left and right, and Agent Mac MacKenzie, Titanium Man, Lady Punisher, Man-Eater, Red Raven, Blackjack O'Hare, and Thori the Hel Hound are having no luck trying to stop the bad guys while masquerading as company mascots. There's incredible pressure to perform or be replaced, and the only lead they have could potentially disgrace their employers... the killers might just be potential Super Team® recruits that went rogue after being rejected for the heroic promotion! Did big business create the enemies it's now trying to fight? Saving the day just got harder, because now our unlikely heroes have to do it while hiding the truth!
32 PGs./Rated T+...$2.99
CORPORATE AVENGERS #3 ***Limited Series***
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
“THERE'S NO LIMITED LIABILITY ON REVENGE”
Be transformed into a superhero and make millions as a company spokesperson. Why wouldn't ex-Guardsman Samuel "Ramshot" Caulkin agree to that? Unfortunately for him, it [i]was[/i] too good to be true. After months of agonizing gene therapy, Samuel gained the proportionate strength and agility of a camel, a massive hump that allowed him to go weeks without water, and the ability to comfortably endure extreme temperatures. He was... Joe Camel! But things didn't go as "smooth" as his tagline implied. Before the Corporate Avengers Initiative finalized their Super Team, the others decided that they didn't want to be associated with a tobacco company. Joe Camel was out, destitute, and as an anthropomorphic camel, had limited prospects for getting normal work. He was left with only one thing in life - a burning desire for revenge! The big corporations would pay, and he'd recruit other Super Team rejects to help him! Arnim Zola's creation, the non-human bioform called Doughboy, was literally molded by Pillsbury into the adorable "Poppin' Fresh" - but he killed a man who poked him in the tummy. Melf, nicknamed the "Elf with a Gun," was a great "Ernie Keebler" before he, unsurprisingly, shot several bystanders. The Rubber People, sentient rubber containers spawned from the imagination of reality-warper Jimmy Jupiter, were perfect mascots for Rubbermaid - before it was revealed that they were fascists! Now they're all about to kill every corporation hiding assets in Panama - unless Colonel Sanders (Mac MacKenzie), the Google Android (Titanium Man), Erin Esurance (Lady Punisher), Tony the Tiger (Man-Eater), #Twitter (Red Raven), the Energizer Bunny (Blackjack O'Hare), and Spuds MacKenzie (Thori the Hel Hound) can stop them!
32 PGs./Rated T+...$2.99
CORPORATE AVENGERS #4 ***Limited Series***
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
“THE DEATH OF COLONEL SANDERS”
The all-corporate Super Team® confronted Joe Camel's gang of rejected company mascots - and the result was a disaster!
Colonel Sanders, a.k.a. retired S.H.I.E.L.D. agent “Mac” MacKenzie, was shot to death by Ernie Keebler, a.k.a. Elf with a Gun. Or at least... that's what everybody thinks! Turns out, it was actually a temporal bullet that "unstuck" him in time (because that is a thing that has happened before with surprising frequency). Now Colonel Sanders finds himself floating between historical events and places, inexplicably drawn to individuals who would become advertising icons in the future - but whose heroic legacy warrants so much more reverence!
In 1814, he's with the President's wife, Dolly Madison, as she tries to stop British troops from burning Washington and winning the war of 1812!
In 1875, he's with Aunt Jemima as she faces down a mob of armed slavers in order to buy time for her people to reach the Underground Railroad!
In 1943, he's on Uncle Ben's rice farm defending against Nazi saboteurs looking to starve the Allies!
In 1958, he's ousting drug traffickers from Colombia with Juan Valdez and his mule, Conchita!
Can he survive each moment in the past and return to 2016 in time to save his teammates and the corporations he was paid to protect? Or by the time he returns, will Joe Camel have already smoked them all?
32 PGs./Rated T+...$2.99
CORPORATE AVENGERS #5 ***Limited Series***
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
DEMON IN A CHROME OS
Is there a traitor on the Super Team®? After the crash of the Amazon Prime drone ship, the Google Android (a.k.a. “Titanium Man” Jake Miller) has been accused of having no brand loyalty and supporting the carcinogenic Joe Camel and his gang of misfit mascots in their effort to kill the world's largest corporations. Arrested by the U.S. Government, the Android now sits in custody. His only defense? A security screen that perma-locks after 10 failed password attempts! Will Google succumb to political pressure and give the authorities a back door into his mech suit before his teammates can prove he's not the double agent? And if he's not the double agent... then who is?
Meanwhile, Joe Camel's plan begins to reach its endgame. As he continues channeling the life-force of slain corporations into a financial institution, he prepares to unleash a monster into the world that is too big to fail at destroying it - Goldman Sachs, the Living Investment Banking Firm!
32 PGs./Rated T+...$2.99
CORPORATE AVENGERS #6 of 6 ***Limited Series***
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
"TOXIC ASSETS"
"I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies." - Thomas Jefferson
In the market-shattering conclusion to the critically acclaimed "Corporate Avengers," the nihilistic and carcinogenic Joe Camel has finally captured the life essence of enough slain corporations to effectuate his evil plans for global refinancing! In an unholy ritual, he's used stock market magic to unleash Goldman Sachs, the Living Investment Banking Firm! This monster viciously attacks the securities market, bursting bubbles and obliterating everyone's savings! Unless the Super Team® can stop the beast, the middle class will be rendered extinct forever! But it's a tall order for a fractured squad of z-list heroes dressed as company mascots...
The Google Android, Energizer Bunny, and Spuds MacKenzie try in vein to halt the monster's rampage while Colonel Sanders, Tony the Tiger, and Erin Esurance track down Joe Camel with the goal of figuring out how to reverse his spell. But the action intensifies as #Twitter, who was revealed as the traitor last issue, gets in a flame war with her former teammates - where she's literally trying to light them on fire!
32 PGs./Rated T+ …$2.99
CORPORATE AVENGERS #7 (<-- legacy numbering!)
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
3D Lenticular Variant Cover
Chromium Variant Cover
Glow-in-the-Dark Variant Cover
Indestructible Tyvek® Variant Cover
Thermal Ink Variant Cover - Rub to reveal a secret anti-smoking message!
Scented Ink Variant Cover - Scratch to smell KFC's signature fried chicken aroma!
“REBRANDED"
Press Release - Listen up, kids! Big Tobacco kills 480,000 people a year, and even their former mascots are lethal! Last year, carcinogenic terrorist Joe Camel was brought to justice by the legendary Super Team®, but now he's escaped custody and only a reunited Super Team® can bring him to justice! Colonel Sanders returns to action, powered by Southern grit and KFC's Zinger Spicy Chicken Sandwiches, available now in a $5 Fill Up, but can he reassemble our heroes before Joe Camel targets another low-income neighborhood?
Real Talk - Al MacKenzie is a retired S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. After he earned enough money to pay for his wife's medical expenses, he swore he'd never don the white suit or ingest the super soldier herbs n' spices again. But the world needs Colonel Sanders... and the advertising agency handling superhero promotion for seemingly every major global corporation - the "Control Group" - is very interested in reuniting the Super Team®. The amount of money they're offering is, frankly, stupid large. Plus, MacKenzie knows first hand how dangerous Sam "Joe Camel" Caulkin, the escaped maniac who mutated himself into an anthropomorphic camel, truly is. Someone has to catch him. So the Colonel rides again, but can he convince his old teammates to join him? Can he even find them?
Meanwhile, the fugitive "Joe Camel" stumbles across a conspiracy bigger than any of his plans. What are the Conspicuous Wars and what role will the Super Team® have to play in them?
32 PGs./Rated T+ …$2.99
CORPORATE AVENGERS #8
Written by CHIP ZDARSKY
Plot by EXCITER
Art by SKOTTIE YOUNG
Holo Foil Variant Cover
Gatefold Variant Cover
Embossed Variant Cover
Colorforms® Design-Your-Own-Cover Variant Cover
Thermal Ink Variant Cover - Rub to reveal a secret preservation message from the Wold Wildlife Fund!
Scented Ink Variant Cover - Scratch to smell Kellogg's Frosted Flakes in milk!
"ENEMY OF THE GRRREAT"
Press Release - He's the best there is at what he does, and what he does is Grrreat!!! He's Tony the Tiger, fierce defender of goodness whose claws and highly attuned senses are kept sharp by Kellogg's Frosted Flakes breakfast cereal and it's brand new flavors: marshmallow, cinnamon, and "Choco Zucaritas"! He's been off the grid for a while, dedicating himself to tiger conservation efforts in India and China, but when Colonel Sanders puts out the call to reunite the Super Team® in response to Joe Camel's recent prison break, you can bet your last sugar-coated flake that Tony the Tiger will answer!
Real Talk - The Control Group, an advertising agency that handles most corporate superhero promotions, has identified Malcolm "Maneater" Murphy as the next "hero" that needs to rejoin the Super Team®. But it's been a long time since the half man/half big cat last donned the famous red handkerchief of Tony the Tiger. Since then, Maneater returned to mercenary work where he eventually found himself captured and brainwashed by a group of aiyars (Indian ninjas) called the Khanjaror. They've been using him to terrorize Mumbai like a modern day anthropomorphic Shere Khan, and because the Control Group wants to keep this turn of events hush-hush to avoid bad P.R., the only one who can stop him now is his old teammate: "Colonel Sanders" Al MacKenzie! Can the Colonel find a way to unwash his friend's brain before he and his famous white suit are torn to shreds?
32 PGs./Rated T+ …$2.99